Natural

Natural lubrication

When a woman gets really turned on, her vagina starts to produce a lubricating fluid. This slippery liquid cuts down on friction during sex, and smoothes out the ride as it protects delicate tissues. Inexperienced or selfish lovers often rush into having penetrative sex too quickly, causing problems with vaginal dryness. The answer to this is letting foreplay go on much longer, until she is truly ready. Unlike the vagina, the anus is non-self lubricating and the tissues can easily tear.

When you need extra

The body's natural lubrication can be reduced by many things, including certain parts of the menstrual cycle, breastfeeding and alcohol intake. At times like this, it doesn't matter how excited the woman gets, she just won't make enough of her own 'love lotion'. It might be the right time to get a bit of extra help.

Some people use a dab of saliva, but others prefer to buy lubricating products. Whatever you decide upon, don't be tempted to resort to using oil-based products such as moisturiser, massage oil, baby oil, or Vaseline. They can rot a condom in seconds, and are hard to wash out of the body afterwards. For safer sex, choose a water-based lubricant.

Popular lubes

Oil-free lubes can be bought in the chemist (usually on a shelf near the condom section), or from sex shops. Popular brands include KY Jelly, Sensilube, Liquid Silk, Wet, and Probe. There are also some flavoured and coloured gels on the market, but these are not recommended for internal use.

Notes about Nonoxynol-9

Many lubricants have a spermicidal action, including the ingredient Nonoxynol-9 (N-9), which has been the subject of much confusion after it was originally marketed as providing extra protection against HIV and STDs.

Research in 2001 revealed that condoms with N-9 provide no more protection against pregnancy or infection than plain lubricated condoms, and since N-9 condoms may cause irritation, they should not be promoted for any purpose. Many manufacturers have now agreed to remove lubricants and condoms containing N-9 from the shelves.

Advice about N-9, supported by Terrence Higgins Trust, includes the following:

• N-9 provides no protection against STIs or HIV and should not be used for disease prevention;
• N-9 containing products should not be used rectally. To do so could increase your risk of getting HIV or other STIs;
• Vaginal contraceptive products containing N-9 remain a viable contraceptive option for women at low risk of HIV who do not engage in multiple acts of intercourse in one day;
• At higher frequencies of use (more than once a day), N-9 may facilitate HIV transmission; therefore women who have frequent sex or are at risk of HIV should use another form of contraception.

Top tips for using lube

• An extra blob of lubricant inside the tip of a condom can give him some added sensation.
• Lube can make a hand-job more comfortable for him or for her.
• If you're trying anal play then be sure to use plenty of water-based lubrication and be sussed about safer sex. For penetration (by penis or sex toy) always use a strong condom to prevent the risk of STI transmission, and always change your rubber if you go on to enter or re-enter the vagina.